Script Feedback | Development

After handing in the first draft of my script, I received some feedback for it.

• Create a backstory for the character and present it through the visuals.
• With this point, I knew that the character should have a backstory, but I didn't really want to present it too much. This is because I wanted to create a mystery as to why the character is depressed. 
• Since the video is mainly portraying the inside emotion of someone with depression, I wanted to emphasise this through not giving away too much about the reasons why. Someone with depression wouldn't often think about why they are depressed, and this is something that I wanted to carry through within the video
• However, saying that, I am going to write the letter and make it look like its dirty and tattered to imply something about the person who sent the letter. 
• Also, in one shot, the character will have bruises on her body, which will also imply that she either self-harms herself or she has previously been abused by someone. 
• Overall, I want the audience to think about and decide for themselves why she is depressed, through the imagery I will be showing.

• How is the isolation going to be shown?
• I will be presenting this, not only through the character being sat on the bed curled up, but also through the sound design.
• I will only add the ambience sound along with the phone text message tone, and words/phrases will be heard to portray the character talking to herself. 
• By having this, the scene will feel empty and hopefully the 'talking to herself' element will show that the character is always in her own head, which will create the sense that she is isolating herself from everything and everyone around her.

• What will the landscape shot be and where will it take place?
• For this shot, I was going to show a calm area, like a lake or a peaceful bit of scenery to create a contrast from the rest of the poem. 
• I'm either going to look for a place and shoot it on one of my shoot days, or I'll find some footage that I have previously shot.

• How will the flashback memory be presented?
• This will all be presented through the colour and the look of the visual. I will colour correct the image to start off, and then I'll add a glow effect or a subtle blur so it has a different look to the other images.
• Similar to other shots, I will desaturate the colour of the image so it is consistent throughout the whole video. I may also experiment with the exposure of the clip in order to add to the dream effect.

• What will the calm imagery entail?
• The calm element of some lines in the poem will be presented through symbolism. 
• For example; the shots with the candle will represent calmness, and the audio will be quite simple for these shots so the calm symbol is clear. 

• How will the last shot be 'strong' and 'powerful'?
• This will be done through the sound design.
• The shot before will have a build up of a lot of different layered sound effects, and the next shot which is the last one, will have nothing but the dull background ambience.
• The fast impact of the previous sound will effect the audience and the silence straight after, will add to that effect and will hopefully keep the audience wanting more.